I decided to plant myself at my computer and simply write.
Who knows what will come out of this today.
I’ve needed to write all week, but instead I’ve been reacting, doing, and trekking through life.
My brain feels crowded, fried, congested, and overwhelmed.
I mentioned that September is a hard month around here.
I’m ready for it to go.
At the same time there have been good experiences. For the sake of my wavering mental health, I think it’s best that I share some positives:
OH MY GOODNESS! You guys…see how I’m struggling for language?
Gil and I had tickets this past Wednesday to see Elton at the Savannah Civic Center. I’m not sure if this had to do more with my recent circumstances and that I simply needed a night out in a bad way, but it was one of the best concerts I’ve ever attended. Hands. Down.
The anxiety I’ve experienced this month is above any I’ve dealt with in a long time, so getting the kids situated with Gil’s mom and getting downtown and parking in the parking deck and rushing, and then some crazy debacle with a broken metal detector on the way in that made us miss the opening was stressful.
When we actually made it inside, we were wedged in a huge crowd of irritated ticket holders. I was grateful that I’ve practiced plenty of yoga breathing and am fairly adept at consciously centering myself through breath-work during stressful situations. But still…I could feel the panic rising up inside of me.
However, once we made our way to our seats, all my previous stress melted away and I was simply there.
Elton’s timeless music and his voice and talent pulled emotions from deep inside of me in way I was not expecting. It was a bit jarring, but in a good way.
A cleansing and cathartic way.
I knew I would enjoy the concert — I’ve never seen him in person — but I was taken with his charisma and how connected I felt to him while he was performing. This was an unexpected bonus.
Elton John has always been intriguing to me — he’s quirky and a bit of an enigma and such an unbelievably gifted artist — and I suppose because of this, I expected a more detached performance. I mean, he’s been performing for decades and is wildly successful.
I couldn’t have been more wrong.
HE was amazing. The ENTIRE BAND was amazing. These musicians were killing it and all looked as though they were truly having the time of their lives.
I was in awe because Elton John is nearly 70 years old. The guys in the band had to all be around that age and I’m guessing even the youngest members were over fifty-five.
They were spectacular.
It was inspiring and made me think about how I want to be living out a passion like that as I enter the latter half of my life.
They were so alive and in their element.
The energy from the stage was something I absolutely DID NOT expect. Every one of my senses were engaged, and at times I had tears streaming down my face. I’m still grasping for language to describe it.
I can’t help but think of it as a spiritual experience.
Perhaps I should have called this post The Time I Had An Emotional Breakdown During the Elton John Concert, because that is seriously what it felt like. It was a much-needed release, and I’m still processing all of it.
They played for nearly three straight hours, and the set list was the perfect mix of familiar classics with some of the newer tunes.
I can’t say enough about how unbelievable their performance was. And Elton himself was wholeheartedly gracious and lovable and lacking ego. I mean, I wanted to invite him over after the show.
After every song he would get up and bow to his band as if to say — This is not a sole endeavor; this is all of US. Then he would walk around the stage and acknowledge the audience from multiple angles. His smile was magnetic, and it was obvious that he was having a blast and that sharing this brilliant, artistic gift — his music — is what he was put on this earth to do.
It was truly inspiring, and in the midst of a hard time, I’m so grateful I was able to push past discomfort and anxiety in order to experience a true legend.
I’m still basking in awe and gratitude.
What experiences have you had that pulled out buried emotions? Does music have this effect on you?