Once again, I declared that I was going to write more, and once again I failed miserably at blogging for thirty straight days.

Is it horrible that I am completely okay with that?

I blogged more, and I wrote more.

Progress, not perfection.

As a recovering perfectionist who once lived life berating herself for everything she felt she should be doing, I almost don’t know what to do with myself.

What happened? Why did I not power through?

Well… LIFE is the only answer I can give.

I have been journaling, and I have a lot of topics that I want to expound on, but I want to give more time to them instead of just churning out something for the sake of posting. Is that perfectionistic? I actually don’t think it is. I think it’s a case of respecting my craft. I want to put out something of value. I can word vomit in my journal, but I want my blog to be a bit more polished.

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I’ve also had a week of really HORRIBLE sleep. I’m not sure what’s going on. Well… I do and I don’t know. I was supposed to be weaning down on a sleep med that I take pretty regularly. I’m here to report that without it I might be getting four hours a night, and that is NOT cutting it.

I never sleep great in the summer. So much daylight. My kids are in and out at all hours, so even when I do sleep, it’s often disrupted. I function, but I’m short-tempered and edgy. I just want a solid 7-8 hours. Is that too much to ask? Evidently it is…

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Then there’s our bathroom renovation. Dear GOD. Yesterday, a friend got very excited when I told her that we were renovating. She wanted to know all about the changes we were making and the colors and fixtures and all the things. I did not want to disappoint her, but blog pals, I can be honest with you — there is NOTHING that excites me about renovating. In fact every aspect of home projects wears me completely out. I just want it to be done.

I am currently sharing a fairly small bathroom with three males. I need some space. Thankfully, we do have two functioning toilets, but one is in the bathroom that’s being renovated.

Today while Wallace was showering before work I found myself in the half renovated bathroom doing my business straddling a couple of power tools and a shop vac. Need I say more? I think this might be another reason my sleep hasn’t been great. The bathroom is next to my bedroom, and tools and debris are spilling over into the bedroom.

I also think that after 26 years of marriage, I should be used to the way Gil approaches home projects, but this bathroom renovation is reminding me that I most definitely am not. Gil owns and operates a pretty large general contracting firm. He has degrees in construction management, architecture and engineering. He manages large projects like historic hotels, museums, higher education expansions…. you get the idea. He’s experienced and very good at what he does. But we have a bit of that the cobbler’s children have no shoes situation going on. Our home projects drag on and on and, and he struggles with letting go of control. He’s entirely too aware of how much things cost in the building world, and he’s already fired two contractors during the two months we’ve been re-doing this bathroom. Now he’s decided to oversee everything himself, which might be fine if he didn’t have an actual job. Summer is always extremely busy for his company, and this summer is no exception.

I said something to Piers the other day about how his dad has been in a rotten mood. Piers responded,

“Well, I really think Dad bit off more than he can chew with this bathroom.”

The reality is that this is nothing new to me. We built an entire house together. I have been involved in boocoodles of home projects with Gil. Ultimately, they turn out great, but they take forever, and he gets very grouchy in the process.

Sorry, Piers. This is the reality of renovating with your dad.

I kept my thoughts to myself.

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Summer is winding down. Wallace starts his senior year a week from tomorrow. Piers will start college a couple of weeks later. I’m ready. They’ve been working late nights and on nights when they’re not working, they’re often out with friends or their friends are at our house. I love the low-key summer days, but by late July I am ready for more structure.

We have a revolving door of teen boys at our house. I really do love it. So much life and energy, but as I mentioned, the lack of sleep is getting to me. I will be taking something to help me sleep tonight.

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I’d be remiss if I failed to talk about the unrelenting heat. I wouldn’t want to have my southern card revoked, so here ya go. Good LORD it’s oppressive as all get-out, and it’s not even August yet. Thankfully, there’s an ocean and plenty of swimming pools around. Gil has been swimming laps everyday at the YMCA. I did the thing that I swore I’d never do after my kids aged out of the neighborhood swim league – I joined some neighbors and floated in the neighborhood pool. That cooled me off for a minute.

Then yesterday my tennis friend Natalie invited me and a couple of other girlfriends over to her house to swim. Lots of people here have pools, but Natalie’s is next level. The pool overlooks a giant span of marsh, and the view is stunning. Water helps with the heat, even though we’re basically all paddling around in warm water because it’s so damn hot, but it still helps.

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What’s new in your world? How’s the weather? What’s your favorite summer activity?