Crazy, right? I seriously can't believe it's actually been that long. Five years ago, after lots of back and forth, messing up, promising we'll do better, yada, yada, yada, Gil and I got rid of ALL of our credit cards. I am proud of the progress we've made and our commitment to living within our … Continue reading I Haven’t Used Credit Cards In FIVE Years
Marriage
For the Love! Why Can’t I Just Eat?
So I haven't blogged in over a month, and I woke up this morning with an unquenchable urge to pour my heart out to the internet. Actually, I don't think this is so much the case but rather my head is all over the place, and writing is a healthy way to center myself. Let's … Continue reading For the Love! Why Can’t I Just Eat?
I Need a Vacation
I found out on Thursday morning that my closest friend is moving. I'm beyond upset. Ani and her husband, Zip, have been our best friends for the last four years. They have two girls who are like my own children; Zip and my husband, Gil, play together in a band, and I really don't know … Continue reading I Need a Vacation
Marriage is a Lot of Work
After much pondering, going back and forth about the destiny of my marriage, I recommitted myself and chose to stay married to Gil and work out our problems. I didn't do so flippantly. I spent hours in therapy, prayed, meditated, yelled and screamed, cried, spoke with people I respect -- both married, single, and divorced. … Continue reading Marriage is a Lot of Work
I’m Alive
I woke up this morning and decided that I'm ready to blog again. I went on an unplanned sabbatical and stayed a bit longer than planned. I think bullets are in order.Marriage -- oh, where to begin. Gil and I survived the holiday chaos and made it through stronger, or so I thought. The past … Continue reading I’m Alive
I Hurt Too Much to Blog
Typically, writing is healing for me, but lately it just feels like one more thing to do. I've been surviving each week by focusing on my kids and staying busy. I just don't want to be still long enough to feel the pain. I'm a big believer in working through difficult situations, but I'm trudging … Continue reading I Hurt Too Much to Blog
Tell Me This Will Get Easier
I'm having a bit of a meltdown this morning. The reality is hitting me that I must file for a divorce and go through with it, but I'm so very afraid. I want to believe that I am strong enough to get through this, but I have so many doubts. In a perfect world, we … Continue reading Tell Me This Will Get Easier
Strattera Update — Days 7-10
Day 7-10: Strattera I've been on 40mg all week, and I feel like shit. Is it the medication? I honestly have no idea, but I suspect that it's circumstantial. I'm on week five of Gil traveling. I don't miss him, but I do miss having another adult who parents our children -- not that he's … Continue reading Strattera Update — Days 7-10
Day 6 — Strattera Update
Day 6: 40mg Strattera around 11am After finishing the five days of the 20mg sample packet, I moved on to the 40mg. I'm not feeling great -- foggy and drugged. About thirty minutes after taking it, my entire family was annoying me beyond description. This might be a coincidence, but I'm afraid this med might … Continue reading Day 6 — Strattera Update
Prepare for the Crash
My therapist once told me that it would be a good idea to plan ahead for emotional tough times. This discussion was a long time ago, so I won't pretend to remember all the details, but I've put this somewhat odd concept into practice -- at least in certain areas. For example, I think I've … Continue reading Prepare for the Crash
Grief Happens 