My previous post touched on the why. Now I’m going to set my schedule and fill in accordingly. Again, working my stuff out on this blog.
The biggie here is that I’ve reached a point where I do not want to get out of bed in the morning. I think it’s a bad case of overwhelm and all of my work feels life-sucking. I don’t exactly feel depressed, but I’m definitely unmotivated. I think it comes down to the fact that for the past two months or so, none of my work (actual job or family stuff) is energizing. I feel like it’s all stuff I have to do.
I get it — part of that is just being an adult, but I know myself well enough to know that if there’s no fun built in — as in stuff I really want to do, I rebel and do nothing, and I seriously procrastinate on all the things that must get done. And NO, I understand that this mentality is not productive, but I feel it’s worth admitting with the hopes of improving or rather acknowledging in order to change.
I’m logging my day tomorrow and plan to follow this as closely as possible. I have a lot of free time tomorrow. I’m not doing any work for Linda (my actual job that pays actual money) but Piers and Wallace have been out for a week on Fall Break and they’ll return to school in the morning. This adds to things I have to do. Gil has also been on vacation and though he’s not feeling well today, I’m assuming he’ll be going back to work in the morning and most likely working late all week playing catch-up after vacation.
Maybe I’ll post the schedule that I intend to follow and then tomorrow I’ll write out how it actually went. I know. This could get boring, but I need to do this for myself. I’d also love to hear how others schedule their time.
5:30 — Get up, grab drink, go work out — I’ve been slack lately and gotta get better with this. Tomorrow I’ll plan to do elliptical and some free weights and cool down with some yoga.
6:15 — Shower
6:30 — Get kids up and dressed (which means I have to prepare backpacks, lunches & something of a breakfast tonight & get Gil’s clothes out for in the morning — I KNOW! I shouldn’t have to do this but doing it makes our morning run more smoothly)
7:15 — Ideally this is when Gil and the kids should be out the door.
7:30 — Get dressed, makeup, hair, all that. I don’t do this everyday which is something else I dislike about working from home, but tomorrow I’m meeting a friend for coffee at 8:30ish.
8:15 — Leave to meet J (one hour max)
9:30 — 2:15 — unstructured time where I need to do lots of things — housework, unpacking, call for haircut, laundry, writing?, figure out Tuesday soup kitchen — brown beef, get browners, etc., figure out something for dinner, maybe go to store, gift for Bryn, start thinking about Christmas, edit friend’s paper and respond to her email. I need to eat lunch or something. OMG. Schedules make me crazy, but maybe I can stay off social media tomorrow — I’ve been avoiding my to-do list and binging on internet time.
2:15 — leave to pick up kids.
2:45 — snacks, homework, etc.
3:30-4ish — TV, game time for Piers and Wallace — now I have to figure out what to do during this time. Maybe dinner. Hopefully I will have come up with something by then. Meal planning is a pain in my ass. If I could scratch this part of my life, I could get a lot more done. I KNOW!!! Ridiculous, but true.
5:00 — get Piers ready for soccer.
5:30 — leave for soccer
6-7 — Soccer for Piers, just realized Wallace is supposed to walk in a parade with his team. Wonder if Piers’ coach was aware of this conflict when he scheduled practice tomorrow. Perhaps this will be cancelled and I am NOT doing a parade tomorrow. This is me saying NO. Wallace is done with soccer this season. Yes I’m a bad team mom. Plus he’s still snotty. I need to schedule an appt with his pediatrician. The seasonal allergies are rough for him. Poor kid.
7:30 — late dinner which hopefully I will have prepared by now. Kids will have to take baths while I finish up, bedtime stories at table, brush teeth, potty, all that.
8:30 — very latest for lights out for kids — this needs to be earlier but it might not happen tomorrow.
After they’re in bed I have to figure out when to clean kitchen, get clothes ready for Tuesday, finish browning beef if necessary, I guess I’m supposed to be blogging what my actual schedule looks like. This is making my head swim. I know it doesn’t look like a lot to many but it’s a pretty full day. I also have to plan for Tuesday. I think this will help me even if I don’t follow it. Can I do this for the rest of October? I need to do something and I need accountability. I have to feed animals. I said I was going to start walking the dog — maybe right after kids go to school or ideally before. Who knows when Gil will be around this week. I’m gonna be up late tonight getting stuff done. Geesh and it’s 6:20 now.
Okay, this can help me. My next post might be all the things I need to do that are in my head. Mercy.
Are you good at following schedules? How do you do it? If you happen to have ADHD or even if not, do you lose track of time? This is one of my biggest struggles. I need a life coach to move in with me and follow me around. Oh well, no money for that if I’m really going to quit my job. I guess blogging will have to serve as accountability.